Why New York Is the Perfect Place for Auditors

Submitted to Company Newsletter in July 2009

I love the City. There’s so much to do and you’re never at a loss for bright, ambitious, enthusiastic characters. As the summer starts off, let’s all take time to appreciate the City. Let’s especially take time to appreciate being auditors in New York City. I know it sounds crazy, but there are so many reasons why New York City in the perfect place for auditors.

First, there’s the obvious. With the grid-like street system in Manhattan starting above Houston, the alphabetic avenues in Brooklyn starting past Prospect Park, and the sometimes confusing numeric streets and avenues of Queens, the City pretty much foots and cross foots itself.

The distance you walk from the train to the World Financial Center is long for a reason. It’s so you can crash more tourist pictures. I envision a pasty and slightly overweight Jan and Paul Goodman from Liberty City, Kansas posing for their family photo with Kenny and his braces and Cassie with a broken arm as they wear matching USA flag shirts and fanny packs in front of the Winter Garden. As they showcase the memento of the family trip on the fireplace mantle, they will always have to point out to their neighbors how some annoying New Yorker got in the background and ruined the picture. Yes, yes, that will be myself, immortalized in the Goodman’s family treasures, with sweat dripping down my face, cross strapped with computer bags and gym totes, and arms loaded with blue two-inch binders.

It’s a hot pick up line. In this epicenter for arts, culture, entertainment, fashion, etc, you meet the most fascinating people. It’s good to know I am one of those people. Oh, you interview celebrities for a living? I interviewed Jason Katsen in Cost Allocations for Sarbanes Oxley compliance just the other day. Hmm, you designed a runway show for Fashion Week? That reminds me of the time I designed the Management Rep Letter. Everyone was skeptical about moving the 32nd paragraph to the 33rd, but you know, we’re living in a post-modern age. It’s like I always say, “Join the zeitgeist or risk excluding a SFAS 161disclosure.”